Certain websites which shall not be named have apparently offered free “premium” service to certain countries experiencing certain quarantines due to certain viruses. The following is a list of alternate activities you can try if you find yourself stuck indoors for a while.

• Catch up on group chats
• Finally read Lord of the Rings
• Finally watch Lord of the Rings
• Rewatch Lord of the Rings
• Learn mandolin
• Learn baritone ukulele
• Pushups
• Squats
• Pray and do holy stuff (at least a little every day don’t be a jerk)
• Read one of the books on your list
• Read another one of the books on your list
• Read my book
• Read my other book
• Learn Chaldean
• Learn Chaldean more
• Learn another language for some reason
• Work on your novel
• Read the Feynman Lectures
• Write your horrible blog
• Wash your hands at least once a week
• Polish your shoes (instead of you-know-what)
• Type a page of the upcoming critical edition of the Commentary on Aristotle’s Categories by George, bishop of the Arabs (British Library Add MS 14659)
• Better Call Saul
• The Good Place
• Re-binge the Office / Parks and Rec / Breaking Bad / Arrested Development / Nolan Batman trilogy / House
• Altered Carbon was pretty good